Friday, November 11, 2011

Poop & pee on Eureka's US Bank?: an email, YouTube, & song!

[To my loyal reader: sometimes unexpected "news" trumps my carefully laid plans for the progress of my blogs... I still intend to continue to discuss romance and heartbreak in a series of future posts!
           Below is an email I just sent to the local NBC affiliate (with the appropriate e-dresses of those that you might want to write to yourself), within which I have embedded a cartoon take on the offending video "news coverage" of a very big local scoop. ("Poop and Pee" is what sometimes passes for news behind the Redwood Curtain!) Directly below that email is a video response by an Occupy Eureka member to the media attack, a YouTube of the Poop and Pee anthem, and then the Lost Coast Journal's take on the "story," including the hilariously satirical song (lyrics & tune!) about the whole "stink."
          I have already written several posts linked to the Occupy movement. Like many others, I have been amazed at the movement's staying power, and it's resonance with ordinary peopleHere is why "Poop and Pee" is a story worth further consideration: 
          The elite, and the media and politicians that they control, have hit on a new strategy to undermine this Peoples' Power protest. The monied narrative is to emphasize any "crime" and "violence" at the encampments to demand and even impose with police violence an end to the Occupations. The Eureka "Poop and Pee" story illustrates via farce the transparency of these efforts to discredit the Occupiers.
           Enjoy and react!]

tokiemnews@hotmail.com,
kiembetsy@gmail.com,
kiemkelly@gmail.com
ccnewsroom@northcoastjournal.com,
drosso@times-standard.com,
LINK@mendocino.org

11 November 2011

Dear incompetents:

           Even without ever watching lousy TV news I had the misfortune of being exposed to the grossly unprofessional behavior in your KIEM Channel 3 story on Occupy Eureka, now infamously known as "Who pooped and peed on the (US) Bank?" [All of the original YouTube versions of the news report have been taken down on claims by KIEM of copyright infringement, an indication of your embarrassment! However, videos keep arising like mushrooms after a Redwood Curtain rainstorm, and the people will continue to see and hear your rotten work in spite of your efforts to suppress the evidence.]
          While your station has become a national joke, I have yet to hear anything about how you intend to rectify the situation caused by your reporter and camera-person. While retaking kindergarten might be a good idea for the two involved, I would expect ANY news station to fire news-people that had trashed journalism the way these two did.
          Among other things, this reporter made herself THE "story," from start to finish. In case you don't know, that is the number 1 "no-no" (to continue the baby-talk style of the reporter) in Journalism 101.
          What is the station's plan of action in this egregious case?
          Thank you for a prompt and accurate reply (which will be posted in full on the Internet),        phdauthor, Eureka, CA



“Who Pooped And Peed on the Bank?: The Song”

Seven-O-Heaven’s “Will” was inspired by recent events at the Occupy Eureka encampment and sent us this ode to Betsy Lambert.
Click on, hit play, and listen to the new Wall Street anthem, "Ode to Betsy Lambert," just below!
Ode to Betsy Lambert by Andrew Goff
         G                  Em                  C           G
Come gather ‘round Humboldt, I’ll tell you a tale                 
             G         Em                  C                D
‘bout an Occupy camp near the pink county jail           
                   G             Em                       C            G
And how the local news station, they done lifted the veil       
    G               Am              D
by seeking the truth we all crave                   
            D                Am             C               D
Channel 3 asked the question on everyone’s mind           
 G                       Em              D    G
“Who pooped and peed on the bank?”                   

The other news media were all out to lunch
But our own Betsy Lambert acted on a hunch
That the poop in the doorway had been left by the bunch
Of the Occupy camp as a prank
So she shook up their tents and she rattled their camp asking
“Who pooped and peed on the bank?”

The protesters resisted, not sure what to think
But Betsy, determined to find the source of the stink,
Was sure the occupiers would be the first to blink
Somebody had to be blamed!
Since, after all, these were essentially kids, she cried
“Who pooped and peed on the bank?”

The poop’s been bagged up, the pee, it has dried
But the perp’s still at large, we should all run and hide
They might poop on us next, but at least Betsy tried
We all owe her great big ol’ “Thanks.”
But the question’s unanswered, we’re still wonderin’
“Hey, who pooped and peed on the bank?”


[My fav "comment" on the above (in rhyme!), below; all comments are at Lost Coast Journal]

COMMENT / BY JEN SAVAGE / NOV. 10, 1:23 P.M.

And over on Twitter, it’s all #DefeGate
And down in the comments there’s oh so much hate
Suggesting her skills might not be quite first-rate
But her fans take those critics to task
Reminding us who had the gumption to ask…
Who pooped and peed on the bank!

Friday, October 21, 2011

A "newish" resident plays tourist: romantic Paris and Eureka love

Forget Oxford's "Bridge" of Sighs; check out those crossing the Seine in "gay Paris!"
[Teaser: lots of pics of Paris, below!] As my loyal reader knows, as I prepared to leave for Oxford University last month I got a case of Eureka's locally infamous "crud." (Folks aren't sure if it's bacterial or viral, but almost all agree on 2 points:  it afflicts most new residents to the area, which is true of me; and, that it lasts from 4 weeks to 2 months before it slowly dissipates no matter what you do [or don't]).

Anyway, a local new true friend came to my sick house, bringing me herbal "tea and sympathy." Uncharacteristically, I began to "follow my heart" in spite of what my head "knew" (especially "She already has a boyfriend you moron!"), and began FALLING (why do YOU think that we use THAT word?) in love with someone who I thought could never reciprocate in the ways a smitten person like me yearns for. Now, just shy of a month on, I am learning that even grizzled veterans of "the school of hard knocks" (as dear old Dad used to refer to his own unhappy upbringing) can still hope for and sometimes get the improbable! But, wait a minute: didn't I say that she already has a boyfriend?!? Have I joined the Cheating Heart (the original Hank Williams Sr version!) choir?

Beginning with this post, I explore what I have gone through during recent weeks, beginning with my last days in Europe. Travel does (or at least CAN) expand the mind (and heart)! At the end of a series of 4 posts, this "newish" Eurekan will explain how he is dealing with unexpected, ambivalent, and amazing personal developments in his life, still in progress as of this post. The general tendency indicates an evolution in the way that I see, think, and feel about life in general, and in Eureka...
My heart is trying out its long-retired wings, and I have flown psychologically as well as physically between Europe and Eureka with my heart lodged in my throat and threatening to stop beating entirely at the whim of one woman!
[With apologies, a one paragraph digression from the pressing topics at hand: The biggest lost opportunity of my long illness was not my diminished ability to write and speak about my lifelong research on Mexican migration, but the lower level of personal participation in the local variant of the still mushrooming worldwide Occupy Wall Street movement. Now this new post takes us away from the socioeconomic struggle of that movement and into the personal angsts of little old me. But, I want to gently remind my loyal reader that "la lucha sigue" (that is, the fight continues) for a better future for the 99% of the people on this planet (as well as for the health of the planet and its nonhuman species)! The above links allow my reader to continue to obtain the latest information about the Occupy cause -- locally and globally -- and I hope you continue to follow and support it!]

Anyway, after the Oxford Workshop on International Migration -- an amazing experience in its own right -- still sick with both the crud and a seemingly unrequitable passion I had caught in Eureka, I left London in the midst of a record-setting October heatwave and took the sleek Eurostar to "gay Paris" (as the old musicals used to refer to the capital of France). What better place to avert an ill-fated and one-sided "love affair" than a few daze (pills and syrups coursing through my crud-ridden body!) in THE city of romance?!?
A smooth choo-choo! Less than 2 and half hours from London to Paris through the countrysides and under the English Channel...
My common-law bro-in-law had said a month earlier, tongue in cheek, that I needed to check out Pigalle, France's famous red-light district... I guess he thinks I could use some "love," even if it's only the kind that you have to pay for by the act and/or the hour! (Yet I've never even been interested in entering a strip club.) Little did I imagine then that I would wind up booking a Paris hotel room from my temporary Oxford digs just blocks from the Pigalle Metro station... Between that Metro stop and the Tristan Plaza hotel (quite lovely, but about as pricey as "love" by the hour!) it seemed that half the storefronts have the English word "love" in them, like an infamous 3-story sex department store called (in English) "Love Shop"! Clearly, some French entrepreneurs equate the English word "love" with money (but only in Euros, please!)... After all, ALL is Full of Love (the official Bjork version!), oui?!?
The view of a Pigalle side-street from my first Paris hotel room's walk-out balcony.
Pigalle is located a bit to the north-east of the vast area known as "central" (that is, tourist) Paris. This hotel is at a great location from which to explore on foot everything between the bombastic Arc de Triomphe in the north of central Paris to the massive Louvre near the historic center of Paris on two islands in the Seine River. The journey between the Arc and the Louvre is made easy via the broad and renown Champs Elysées. (The Rough Guide to Paris was invaluable, and a 2002 edition is one of the 50-odd books I had purchased at the Eureka Library's "buck-a-bag" book sale in August!)
My $250 (US) room in Pigalle; it was as "big" as it looks, but had great light, and was clean, comfortable, and quiet.
Pigalle is also adjacent to the famous historical artist colony on the Butte of Montmartre... At 130 meters, this hill is the highest point in the city ("Rough Guide to Paris," p. 185), providing some stunning vistas when you least expect them, just around THAT corner. While the demography has gentrified since the days of the Bohemian artists that used to call it home, the buildings have remained all but untouched because ancient underground quarries make the surface too unstable for much new development. I spent my first full day and several of my few precious evenings wandering this butte, which has seen the likes of Renoir, Dufy, Valadon, and Toulouse-Lautrec. The Moulin Rouge remains in its historic location at the bottom of the Butte, near Pigalle, while the Sacré-Coeur Basilica dominates the heights. In between are many great and intimate sights to behold...
The Montmartre Carousel, next to an historic art deco entry to the neighborhood's Metro station.
One of a number of tiny hidden community gardens in Montmartre. Here a local toddler was attracted to an odd water pump, which I noted is widespread in central Paris; it has a crank handle on the top, and water spurts out the side of the pipe. A jogger used it to splash water on his legs and hands...
Only a very successful artist could afford to live in Montmartre today, but the place is rife with French yuppies feasting on locally produced artisan foods at the many bistros and cafes, and tourists like me scouring the "galleries" (mainly "poster art" of the great works of the last few centuries). I bought a machine-woven tapestry replica of a medieval town scene in a store run by a French-Korean family for about $55 (US), which I have since mounted on bamboo (kudos to Dammas for the inspiration for that installation!) and put it up in my kitchen nook. A brocade Renaissance fair with my morning cup!
Brunching al fresco in Montmartre...

An award-winning bakery packs them in...
...and the baguettes and croissants look like they've been dusted in gold!

This was a SUNday afternoon crowd; doesn't it look a bit like Disneyland? (But, it's a REAL neighborhood, not a recreation!)

One of a score of poster art "galleries" in the area...
...with a typical sidewalk display.
The Ugly American, with decaf cappuccino and Crème Brulé for dessert; bon appétit!
Does this cafe's name play on the disdainful attitude the French are said to have toward Americans?
How to spend less than $300 a day in Paris? Piggyback on other tourists' guided tours instead of booking your own!
Approaching the Arc!
Why do old French monuments look so beautiful? The government spends kings' ransoms to restore them,  using...
..."cheap" immigrant labor, mainly from Francophone (former French colonial) Africa!
The nannies in this park made for the babies of the bourgeoisie were all African immigrants too.  They yelled disapprovingly at me when I snapped a pic, which made me wonder if they were worried about their "illegal" status, or if they maintain animist fears about the dangers of losing your soul to the picture box...
 I didn't know that you cross the vast traffic circle around the Arc via an underground sidewalk, so I sprinted across a dozen lanes of speeding traffic, dodging a half dozen honking vehicles, and sealing my well-earned rep as the stupidest American in Paris!
As near as I can tell, Napoleon's Arc surpasses any American efforts to deify imperialistic patriotism...
A floral monument at the Arc, honoring millennia of French cannon-fodder...
Arc detail, One...
Arc detail, Two...
Another way to spend less than $300 a day in Paris? Don't buy tickets to go in or up anything!
That includes the Louvre! No Mona Lisa viewing in my short 5 day visit...
Instead, I strolled the beautiful parks along the Champs-Élysées on 80 degree October afternoons. 
Can you make out the beautiful modern sculptures amidst the trees?
"The Two Towers": the Egyptian Obélisque Luxor and the Eiffel Tower.
In Part 2, based on my anthropological insights I ponder why Parisian women are so beautiful and the city's dogs appear so pathetic even as we continue strolling in the Jardin des Tuileries and across a pedestrian bridge completely covered with tourists' padlocks... In Part 3, the two islands of oldest Paris are described, featuring an ancient bridge built over a thousand years ago yet called "The New Bridge" by the city's denizens today, and marvel at both the external soaring beauty of the Notre-Dame and it's dismally dreary interior. Finally, in Part 4, an overly long journey back to "The States" is chronicled (including how a much delayed but still action-packed "E-ticket" plane ride into a wind-driven storm scares even the seasoned Eurekan natives on board), and the emergence of an "impossible" love startles, scares, and amazes this newish resident glowing behind the Redwood Curtain.

Thursday, September 15, 2011

Occupy Wall Streets Everywhere, including NYC, SF, & LA!

[Note: updates (through 10-7-11) from varied sources (which often include their own updates and live feeds) are posted at the end, fyi... One connected reader told me about the comprehensive and continuing Occupy Together site.]
10-7-11: BofA protesters arrested in LA after trying to cash a $673 billion oversized check for the People of California!
I sent off my final Oxford University draft (I wrote 3 different papers before I got the rants and irrelevancies out of my system!) 2 hours ago, and then went for a walk on a brisk, but partly sunny afternoon. I was relieved to have that paper done, and was plotting all the other things I have to do in the next 12 daze before heading “across the pond.” [I didn't know then that the last week would be consumed with some type of the "Eureka crud"; see this Burning Bridges post on all that.]
They know how to protest over there!!!
Just 2 blocks from my abode I bumped into 2 young couples, some kids, and a beauty of a Rotti named Fariah. The women were on their knees, spray painting piles of broken up cardboard boxes on the sidewalk with a message: “Day of fear for Wall Street; Day of Rage for Us! Sept 17th
Ya think???
Of course, I had to know what was going on! The small group of spray painters I meet then are plugged into an international movement to say NO to corporate elites! I can't believe I only just found out about the global protests planned to begin that weekend... We talked for a while, and they gave me a flyer that says the following:

“September 17: we mean business!

The American government of today is bought and sold by major corporations who control votes, lawmakers, and our tax dollars. They have no moral dedication to the people of this country, and have worked for years to destroy the middle-class and enslave the poor through impossible debts and mental pollution.

There is no justifiable reason in a country so rich and powerful that people should be starving, that children should go without education, and people should work their whole lives with nothing to show for it but debts.
Get used to it! If THE PEOPLE LEAD, then the "leaders" will follow...
The top 1% owns as much wealth as the bottom 93%. Something needs to change.

We will no longer choose to stand still while one of our country’s greatest achievements is skewed and vandalized by the actions of corporate giants.

We will no longer stay silent while our society is destroyed by the downward spiral of mass consumer capitalism. We will stand up for our rights and the rights of everyone that calls the United States home. And we will occupy the San Francisco Financial District. Will you join us? 555 California St, 2 pm, Bring your Tie!”

I began to realize that these protests are part of a global “people power” straegy to take back their lives from the 1% (financiers and speculators) that have used the consequences of their own crimes to demand cuts in public services like education, healthcare, and food for the other 99%. Demands of the latter include ending at last incredibly costly "wars" on "terrorism," (some) "drugs," and other misguided state policies against the 99% of peoples. A few of the facts on the above leaflet may be a bit off, but the overall message is spot on, and as national economies throughout much of the world begin to circle the drain, the facts may soon worsen to those that the flyer foresees!
How many trillions are we spending on all our "wars"?
For the overall Plan of Action, go to:
http://www.occupytogether.org/ 
&/or:
Wow! The Golden Gate IS golden...
For the SF Action, see:
Let's do Hollyweird...
For the LA Action, see:
I need a ride!!!
The Eureka couples told me that folks can pick up a ride on Saturday morning, 5 am, at the K-Mart on south 101; will I see you there?!?


Monday update (9-19-2011) on protests on NYC's Wall Street, from the NY Times...
Who knew that it is illegal for 2 or more persons to wear masks, to write on the sidewalk with chalk, or to impede sidewalk movement by pausing to tell a police officer that the press of people made it hard for him to walk?!? Note the readers' comments at the end of the article, deriding the Times for only writing about arrests, rather than any of the issues bringing people into the streets, and calling for this protest to be the beginning of something important and necessary.
Signs of the (NY) Times protests on Wall Street.
Arrested for telling a cop that it is too crowded to move any faster (see Times article for the series of photos related to this arrest...)!
Wednesday update (9-21-2011), commentary on NYC's Wall Street protest, by Amy Goodman!
Sunday update (9-25) from the NY Times heaps scorns the young protesters, while a smaller report suggests abuses of their civil rights...
Monday update (9-26) from the NY Times provides another charge of police misconduct during the protests, and a series of short videos suggest both the larger and more diverse demonstrators than media reports have presented.
Wednesday update (9-28) of Michael Moore talking with Amy Goodman on the spark that could become a movement, and an update on day 12 of the Wall St Occupation.
Saturday update (10-1): 700 arrested on the Brooklyn Bridge; these protestors are not giving up yet, and please note the readers' comments at article's end!
Sunday update (10-2): 15 days' of live streams, and many other news links; SF Chronicle update!
Monday update: NYT notes solidarity protests arising across America, including in LA (below)
Thursday update: Obama FINALLY expresses solidarity with protesters, and frustration with those rich folks that oppose his VERY modest proposals on taxes and jobs.
Are you here?
Tuesday update: (reporting on) the protests begins to mature..."
Wednesday's update (10-5): big labor unions and their workers join Occupy Wall Street protests in NYC and elsewhere!
Thursday's update from LA, in full:
Taking to the streets for a cause worth going to jail for!

"Hundreds of Occupy LA Protesters take over Downtown Intersection."

Police said Thursday that the number of protesters that had been picketing banks downtown has swelled to about 500 and that a march had taken over the intersection of 7th and Figueroa streets. Officers in riot gear were dispatched to the scene and arrests may be imminent if the protesters did not disperse, police said. The march was sponsored by the ReFund California campaign with support from Occupy Los Angeles protesters who have been camping outside City Hall since Saturday.

Protesters initially indicated to police that they would engage in acts of civil disobedience, causing authorities to redeploy officers from around the city to the area. On Tuesday afternoon, several dozen protesters with signs and a bullhorn picketed outside the Westwood home of a One West Bank executive. About 50 demonstrators showed up outside the home and stayed about 30 minutes as Los Angeles Police Department officers looked on." 


Friday's (final) update summary from Nation of Change, in full (feel free to add your own updates henceforth, in Comments:

Dear Readers,
We look to the promise of real revolution as a person dying of thirst looks at a pitcher of water. Our people are desperate for change but at the same time they are cynical. We have seen too many would-be movements fail. We have seen how a lack of organization, or in-fighting, or the failure of media has sabotaged already outmatched causes before they could truly take root. With every arm of the corporatocracy wielded against the spark which just might grow to become a revolutionary blaze it is little wonder that so many before have failed.
This month, we have watched the Occupation of Wall Street spread like wild fire to financial districts across this nation from New York to Los Angeles and many cities in between. Despite the doubt and cynicism of many the movement has continue to gain steam and defy all attempts to silence it.
This month, October 2011, marks the eleventh year of our country’s longest war in Afghanistan and the onset of the 2012 US federal budget, which provides unlimited funds for war and corporate greed, while withholding funds for basic human needs.
Yesterday, a new protest assembled at Freedom Plaza in Washington, D.C. with the goal of “nonviolently resisting the corporate machine by occupying Freedom Plaza to demand that America’s resources be invested in human needs and environmental protection instead of war and exploitation.
We at NationofChange would like to urge each and every one of our readers who are able to step out of the homes and get down to Washington D.C. and join us in demonstrating for this worthy cause.
Let us help spread the momentum of the occupation to new avenues for justice. You can learn more about the October 2011 protest or follow the protest at NationofChange.

Saturday, August 27, 2011

Road Rage and Mayhem on my Bucolic Doorstep

My loyal reader will recall that I began blogging in order to make sense of my constant "bridge burning." I only began a second blog about Eureka after realizing that the community is both creepier and lovelier than I had first imagined. In my first post on the town, I promised that I would discuss an inspiring community institution, and then a shocking crime (in which the "victim" may have been the primary perpetrator!) that occurred only a few weeks after and a few feet away from where I had settled into a charming apartment built in the 1880s to lodge lumberjacks.
Simple, but lovely, with those 6-foot high windows...
This post is the latter of the two promised, discussing what is known about a criminal misdeed, and speculating why such an awful thing might happen in this seeming paradise, while we are forced to wait for evidence and opinions to be presented months from now at a probable trial. Here is a newspaper synopsis of the basic facts (with links to other news reports following in the text, below):

"UPDATE: SHOOTING SUSPECT IN COURT.
Cameron Cramer, 07/26/2011, Times-Standard

[A] 30-year old [man] is accused of shooting a female 3 times while they were both driving in separate cars on H St. and 14th St on Monday around 5:30. The victim was shot twice in her torso and once in the head.  She is in critical but stable condition according to Eureka Police.

On Thursday [the man] was charged with Assault with a deadly weapon, possession of a firearm as a felon and possession of a firearm within 10 years of conviction. [He] turned himself into authorities on Tuesday after S.W.A.T. raided his home [without success], a few blocks south of the shooting scene, on Monday night."
"The bigger the gun, the bigger the fun!" said this Internet photo caption, which does NOT depict the H St. shooter...
As a member of the first TV generation (where crimes are solved, and justice is obtained in less than 50 minutes), I just assumed that the whole story would be revealed within a few daze of this incident, in which a man blasted away at a woman as they drove by my porch, where I was sitting in my pj bottoms and flannel shirt petting a neighbor’s cat. For several days I BECAME part of the story, quoted extensively (about knowing NOTHING about what had just happened!) in the local newspaper, and then for 8 minutes live on a local radio station...
I was sitting right on those steps, in the little forest of rhododendrons and ferns, when the popping began!
Information has dribbled out in the weeks since the crime, including:

An independent witness-supported allegation that the “victim” had repeatedly rammed the shooter’s car just before the latter turned in his seat and, while continuing down H St., blew out his own back window putting three bullets through her windshield and into her, leaving her in critical condition;
Victim's car, after woman crashes into a parked car after getting shot...
Both the man and woman had been arrested previously for a variety of petty crimes, ranging from shoplifting and domestic violence, to DUIs and drug possession;

And, the two may have been involved in at least one previous driving-related altercation, which had led to citations for excessive speed.

The suspected shooter was quickly identified, and the victim was eventually named as well. The shooter’s lawyer made a statement to the press.

What remains unknown to this day is:

What, if any, relationship the two might have had that eventually led to the shooting.

And, the current medical condition (and even location) of the victim. The last pubic information was that she had been moved to a hospital outside of the area, and remained in critical but stable condition.
NOT the victim, who is not this angelic-looking with 3 bullet-holes in her...
The info provided above came out weeks ago, and I have finally given up on getting “closure” any time soon about an event that occurred just yards from my unsuspecting self. However, since that day I have repeatedly noticed rude and even violent road rage-like behavior by folks up here when they are behind the wheel. I have seen this while driving, walking, and especially on my bicycle.
A happy couple (but NOT these two) honked and gestured rudely as they passed my bike; I was apparently slowing them down before they reached the already red traffic light, where I caught up with them and informed them that bike riders have a right to be on the road, and they continued their rude gestures...
I ride my bike whenever possible (gas has JUST dropped [barely] under $4 a gallon up here). A number of drivers have gunned their engines, honked, yelled and/or gestured obscenities, and even swerved in their lane to intimidate me as they passed when I've just been peddling along on the side of the road. As a recent transplant from LA this local behavior well behind the Redwood Curtain is quite unexpected.
Road rage in LA... I GET that!
The people in this small town have no “commute” (the US census reports that the average Eurekian drives less than 10 minutes to and from work!), no traffic, and are surrounded by hundreds of miles of beautiful Mother Nature. So why do so many of them drive so recklessly and with malicious intent?
The snail and the tortoise represent two bike riders not sure who should yield; this also occurs frequently up here...
I have asked various locals about this road-rage-without-the-urban-stressors [Note (10-19): somehow (not for the 1st time!), this post has "lost" the rest of this paragraph... I will rewrite and repost ASAP.]

However idyllic life is here, I too have succumbed to rage-like feelings.

Today, for example, I chose the shortest line at the store, and then felt the anger begin to build as the one guy in front of me dawdled endlessly during the check-out process. He was on his cell phone, of course. Then he realized that he'd forgotten to get some vital item, and rushed back into the aisles to grab something, without so much as an embarrassed look on his slack-jawed fact. Now the cashier had time to look at her cell... He returned to check-out with his new item, and then waited until the cashier finished ringing him up before even looking for his wallet. And, was this really the first time that the guy had ever swiped a debit card and entered his personal info? He seemed so confused, and required step-by-step guidance from the cashier. All of the other lines had cleared by now, but all my crap was already scattered across the converyor belt... Why should I have to gather everything up and move to another check-out station?

I was ready to strangle the self-absorbed bastard, and could feel the physical signs of stress building in my body! It took me a half hour to calm down enough to laugh at myself! What is MY excuse?!? That is fodder for my OTHER blog, on burning bridges.
I'm trying to get some, but it ain't easy to change!
Finally, why did I claim to have obtained “15 minutes of fame” from this incident? After the long news article linked to above, wherein I was quoted as saying I thought I'd heard a series of vehicle backfires, I got a call from a local radio station...

In brief, although preinterviewed before the live exchange, the fact that I couldn’t say anything interesting about what had happened right in front of me the night before still flummoxed the radio DJ interviewing me. In desperation, he asked me on-air why I had recently moved to Eureka. When I told him that I came here to write, he proceeded to fill up the remaining 5 minutes of scheduled airtime by asking me about my three books. I got to outline the contents of each of my hypothetical books on the air. 
How I feel when my writing is going WELL...
Now I have to write all three of them, since hundreds of locals have been forewarned of my intentions! I better get to work...